I am lucky enough to be a favorite cousin, maybe a favorite nephew, and maybe a favorite brother. However, that does not make it easy for me to be around my family. I am not openly gay but honestly gay (Next Blog Entry.) There is a question, you know that question every young man gets. So, *young gay man enters name here*, when you getting married. DO you really want to know when I am getting married or IF I am getting married. SO the first thoughts that come to my mind is, When is your unwed child who has two kids getting married? When is your brother going to get off drugs? I mean of all the things you can be worried about you wanna know when I am getting married? Come on people.
In my family, which i see as regular, you know had some in jail, some drug users, sellers, person who has killed one or many people, umm the things that make for a great movie with a black family, I am "The Gay." Now all the dysfunctional things that I named and oh boy did I leave some out, I feel, and maybe it's me that I am looked at and talked about more than any other. maybe in real life i am just talked about just as much as any. Why though, I don't talk about them. OK I just got sensitive.
My questions to you as you read this are?
Have you made a family member feel uncomfortable regardless of differences yall have?
or
Have you reached out to love a family who may be different in some way to make them feel loved regardless?
2 comments:
I look at family as somewhat of a clique - some members are closer than others, some are judgmental of others, some talk behind each other's backs; not to mention that some families are broken up into different categories, etc. I, the black sheep of my family (of course), have just recently been reaching out to them...wanting to squash whatever issues they may have with me. It's worked, but I STILL know that something as small as 'sexuality' is keeping us from really being 'family'. I hope that made sense.
But, I totally understand where you're coming from, as many of us do. We just have to hold tight to those friends & family that are TRULY accepting of us, flaws & all, and that may not be blood relatives.
Great Post Quad!
Nvncyble, I use to wonder the same things about my family... why are the focus on my love life when we're keeping three pink elephants behind that closet? I soon came to realize why I was always asked when I was getting married and I'm sure it's the same for you. I'm a good man that has things going in my life. I've never been in jail, after high school, I went to college, not the street corner. I served six years in the Armed Forces. I have a great career. Hmmm, forget about why I'm not married, why am I single? LoL.
As to your questions, yes I have reached out to my family members. I am the type that helps out everyone and anyone. When my family starts talking about someone I always play devil's advocate.
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